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Project Runway: Michael Kors’ Best Slams

Zac and Nina rule the roost these days, but there’s always going to be a place in our hearts for veteran judge Michael Kors. His sharp eye and even sharper wit had us all entertained for so many awesome seasons, and with the new run of Runway here, how about a nostalgic look back at when designer brought nuclear-level shade to proceedings?

Poopy pants

Alexandria von Bromssen didn’t impress Michael with her drop-crotch creation for the workout clothing challenge, and he had no problem telling her:

“If you want guys to leave you alone in the gym, wear that look. No-one is talking to you – cos first off you can’t move, second off you pooped in your pants. And your pockets… ‘pleasure me pockets’, they’re creepy!”

Is it bad that we agreed?

Rigatoni Mad Max

During one unconventional materials challenge, Michael Kors gave Elena’s questionable dress a complete dressing down:

“It literally looked like toilet paper caught in a windstorm. To me, she just looks like Rigatoni Mad Max… It’s kind of like when you stare at a cloud and you start seeing things. Now her boobs are turning into old man’s eyes. Okay, now… the crotch just looks like a moustache”.

Ouch.

Slutty x3

Of course, Michael knows how to keep his feedback short and sweet too. When Daniel and Kelli’s model emerged in a teal and leopard-print three-piece outfit, Michael simply described it as:

“Slutty, slutty, slutty”.

He’s not one to mince his words.

Funeral Flamenco

During a “party favours” challenge, Mr Kors singled out one outfit in particular, describing it as:

“Like a transvestite flamenco dancer at a funeral”.

Guest judge Betsey Johnson couldn’t help but giggle – and neither could we.

Breaking Amish

When elimination survivor Sebelia created an unusual asymmetrical dress in purple, Kors wasn’t entirely impressed, calling it:

“Comme de Garcon goes to the Amish country”.

Sheesh.

The Victorian Waitress

Avant-garde is always open to interpretation, and it was always Michael’s interpretation that mattered. Josh C felt the wrath of his acidic tongue when Kors described one aesthetic:

“She looks like a Victorian cocktail waitress in Las Vegas”.

Way to cheapen a look!

On Crotches

If there’s one thing Michael always noticed, it was poor crotch design… and boy did he voice it!

“We have crazy crotch”.

“That crotch is just everyone’s nightmare”.

“She looks like her ass is in her front”.

“She has camel toe in big shorts”.

“Let’s be honest, it did look like she had an old diaper pushed between her legs”.

Take a bow, Mr Kors.